Have you ever tried using affirmations?
Many people who have end up a bit disappointed. Some attribute the failure to not being dedicated enough, others say it shows you aren’t sufficiently aligned with what you desire.
Of course, that begs the question: how do you get aligned with the positives you want to manifest in your life?
Perhaps paradoxically, the answer may well be by first admitting and embracing that misalignment!
How to get aligned
Tapping is a great way to get on board with something you want to change or achieve.
Sylvia Hartmann created a system called Positive EFT, however that’s not what I’m talking about here. Rather, it’s the concept that you first need to weed and turn the earth in your metaphorical garden before you can plant something new.
If there’s a part of you that doesn’t believe you deserve the good things you aspire to, you will find yourself undermining your progress in one way or another.
So, what can you do about it?
First, you need to recognise and release your old baggage, your self-doubt, and any other emotions that are blocking your way. To do this, you can use the setup phrases below, followed by your positive affirmations. Then, as you feel your resistance melting away, you may find yourself thinking about creative ways to start manifesting what you want.
Before going any further, it’s important to get your affirmations right. While there are a lot of pages that can guide you in detail on this subject, here’s a quick run down of what to keep in mind:
1) Make it positive
While you may really want not to get ill, or not to be rejected, these are still about avoiding pain, rather than embracing something. If you start off thinking in the negative, play around until you find the positive phrasing that really expresses what you want. For example, I want to live healthily and happily, or I want to be accepted and loved.
2) Express it as though you have already achieved it
This isn’t about saying I will or I want, but rather I am. For instance, I live healthily and joyfully, or I am deeply loved.
One way people sometimes get around self-sabotage is to soften this by saying something like: I am learning to live healthily. However, if you use the setups below, you will be able to release your blocks and fully embrace the positive, rather than having to water down what you want.
To work through any inner resistance to manifesting what you truly desire, try putting some of these setup statements before your affirmations. This way, you are acknowledging and working through any emotions that might stop you achieving the positives you desire.
Even though I don’t believe…
Even though I find it hard to trust…
Even though I struggle to feel…
Even though I don’t have faith that…
Even though it’s hard to act like…
Rounding Things Out
At the end, the normal phrase is: Even though… I deeply and completely love and accept myself.
This may not really fit with the doubts you are expressing as you release old baggage. If not, check out this post on how to adapt the ‘acceptance’ part of the setup statement. Find something that works for you!
Bringing It All Together
You can start either from where you feel blocked, or from what you want to achieve or feel. In either case, figure out what affirmations express how you want to feel and what you want to do at the end of the process.
Then, start tapping on the side of your hand (the Karate Chop point), while saying three setups before your affirmation/s.
So, you might say:
Even though I don’t believe I am strong and lovable, I accept myself anyway. Even though I struggle to feel creative and resilient, I love and accept myself as I am and as I am becoming. Even though I don’t have faith that I am completely lovable, I accept and forgive myself for my doubts.
Move on to tapping around the points, reminding yourself of your blocks. As you feel these releasing, you can tap again with a milder setup:
Even though I don’t fully/always believe…
Even though I sometimes/occasionally struggle…
Finally, you can just tap with the affirmations. See if you come up with examples of when they have been true, or ways you can encourage those feelings, or first steps to achieve those goals. Let this part be as creative and playful as you like!
As a brief example, here is a video on tapping for feeling strong, lovable and creative: